The Job Hunt Blues

We got back from a thoroughly enjoyable Thanksgiving holiday at relatives to start my job hunt. I have a personal goal of applying to two jobs this week, but have hit some road blocks. First, the jobs I will be applying for are not jobs I really want. One is far away in a place, the other is doing something I don't want to do. So I've been procrastinating on this task.

One way I've been dealing has been to look for openings locally. I've got a list and I'm hoping that I will handle these two with the bulk of applications.

Another has been to bog myself down with self-defeating thoughts: It seems like I have not made it on to the short list for a job I applied for a month ago. One one hand, I had always thought that it would have been unreasonable to think that I could get that job. It's a job in marketing and I just don't have the experience in it. On the other hand, I did have hope they would see the transferable aspects of my experience and skills.

I'm sure there are some lessons to be learned here, but I'm a bit sore at the thought of not even being considered.

I know a person who made it on to their short list. Funny thing is, he's done this sort of thing for so many years, he doesn't want to do it any more. But a job's a job.

Fat Tony tells me it's a good thing. One day I'll look back on this and think how I dodged a bullet. I know he's right, but there is a part of me wondering, "Why not me? What's wrong with me?" There's another part of me that's got the ugly answers. It's the same part of me that needs to chomp on potato chips when the going gets rough.

The difficulty now is to be focused. Here's my dream: to work for myself. Working for a company--it's a path to the dream. There are no guarantees of success for me, but to never have tried is worse than failing. I can't be distracted when others find new jobs because that's not my path, never was.

I need to focus on what's really important and never stop moving on it. What does all this mean? What am I actually going to do? Well, I guess we'll all have to stay tuned.